Beautiful Older Women of the World

You can only perceive real beauty in a person as they get older.  -- Anouk Aimee

 
Beauty is found in all ages and cultures.  I put together this music video because I wanted to showcase beautiful women from all over the world.  Whether they are wrinkled and grey, or have had surgery or botox, I think they are all beautiful in their own way.

Go to this link to see my video on YouTube.com, Beautiful Older Women of the World: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QD6L82Ge76I.

Age well,
Angela Gentile

“Diapers” No More

Loss of bladder or bowel control (incontinence) is a medical condition that often comes with shame, embarrassment and sometimes denial. The stigma attached to this condition often makes it difficult for people to seek the help needed, possibly putting them into a more embarrassing situation (such as having unprotected accidents in public, smelling of urine or feces, or isolating themselves).  Part of this problem has to do with the fact that "babies wear diapers", and we continue to use the word “diapers” for adult products.

If you live long enough, there is a chance that you may need to wear a continence management product that keeps you dry and dignified.  Statistics show that 1 in 5 older adults experience problems with bladder and/or bowel control.  Some medical conditions can be treated with surgery, medications or exercises (like Kegels).  Some conditions need to be managed with products.

The term “diaper” is used to refer to absorbent products that are used for babies and children that are not able to control their urine flow and/or bowels. This is a developmental issue that eventually the child will grow out of.   When adults have problems with their bladder or bowels, it is usually due to a medical problem or a problem with their cognition.  Although children and adults use a similar type of product, it’s important to change the language when referring to adults.

What I want to bring to your attention here is that although many people who are older still recognize and use the term “diapers”, there is a cultural shift that is discouraging this word, as it can be offensive to some.  The following terms are more acceptable and encouraged.

Instead of using the word "diapers", considering the following alternatives:

• Briefs
• Incontinent pads (also used in the UK)
• Incontinence products
• Adult incontinent products
• Absorbent products
• Disposable products
• Protective undergarments
• Disposable incontinent pads
• Underwear (for those who are cognitively impaired)

Sometimes it’s helpful to use one of the above words, with “adult diaper” as a qualifier if the person does not quite understand what you are talking about.  The word “incontinence” is only understood by half of the population.  It’s helpful to let the person know that we don’t use the term “diaper” for adults anymore.  Adults are not big babies.  We want to provide them with the respect and dignity they deserve. 

When I asked the company that sells DEPEND absorbent products what language they use and find acceptable, they replied with:

         

          “…we try to refer to all our products by their name. 

          Or we may use the terms ‘pull on’ vs. ‘open at the

          sides’.”

Let’s all do our part in ensuring dignity, respect and appropriate language when talking about products used for adults.  After all, those with medical conditions deserve respect, and avoiding embarrassment with such a sensitive topic is the least we can do.

Go to this link, to learn more about the facts: http://www.phac-aspc.gc.ca/seniors-aines/publications/archive/public/age/info-exchange/incontinence/incontinence1-eng.php

Regards,

- Angela Gentile

Aging Beauties

Celebrity status depends a lot on how a woman looks as she ages.  Plastic surgeries, botox, and skin care can all help women "fight" the signs of aging.  Most important is how a woman caries herself as she ages, and what kinds of messages she gives to the world.  Some plastic surgeries completely change the look of how a person looks, and it's not always for the better.

Wrinkles and saggy skin are a natural part of aging.  Do images of aging beauties (that most likely have had a lot of help in the anti-aging department) harm people?  Or does it inspire?  Is this a positive view of aging?  Or is it unrealistic?

In the USA, there are many beautiful aging women in show/music business, and here is a great video I found on YouTube.com.  It's called, "20 Most Beautiful Women Over 50". It is set to an Etta James song. Not everyone can afford the money it takes to keep up with the wrinkles and sags, but here are some famous women who appear to be aging well in the looks department. To go to this link, click here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kUECWLjPeSQ.

There are probably many more women that can be added to this list. Who would you add?

Age well,
Angela Gentile

Language and Terms for People who are Past Middle Age

There are many terms used for people who are in the 60-ish plus age category.  Those who move from that undefined "middle age" into the next age category don't want to be labeled with a negative term that makes them sound "old".  Sometimes I wonder when did "old" become a bad word?  The majority of today's older people are remaining quite active and longevity is challenging our beliefs about the ways in which we refer to our older population. Words such as elderly, seniors and senior citizens often conjure up negative connotations.  Political correctness, and acceptable language is helping to eradicate ageism and help people in their later years (and others) look at their stage of life in a positive light.  Here's what I've found in my research in terms of language:

Thumbs down to:
Seniors (now considered passé to the Baby Boomers) 
Senior Citizens
Elderly (associated with the term geriatric or those who live with senility) 
Old
Seasoned
Aged

Thumbs up to:
Older adults
Third age (the age of personal fulfillment termed by the late Peter Laslett) 
Active agers
Elders (Very different from elderly.  Adopted from the First Nations community in Canada.  Elders are revered for their wisdom and life experience and the title Elder is a compliment in First Nations communities) 
Active Older Adults
Baby Boomers or Boomers (those born between the years 1946-1964)
Retirees (if in fact they are retired)
A person aged _______ (fill in the blank with their age with no other label)
People aged _______ (fill in the bland with an age-range with no other label)

Maybe:
Pensioners (mainly a U.K. term)
Older people
Older person
Mature-aged

If you're really struggling :)

Old = Chronologically gifted or experientially advanced
Old person = Gerontologically advanced

Just as we would call someone a child, a teenager, or an adult, I think it's most acceptable to use the term "older adult" when speaking about those who are in the 60-ish plus age category.  Middle age can span many years, and that magical time when one becomes an older adult is quite individual and undefined.  In Canada, one receives the "Old Age" Pension when they are 65.  Is this the magical age then?  Not world-wide that's for sure.  There is a more definitive breakdown from there - the young-old, the old-old, very old and the oldest old. 

Remember the old saying, "To Me, Old Age is Always 15 Years Older Than I Am", Bernard M. Baruch.

Whatever term you decide to use is okay as long as you do it with good intentions in mind.  It is never okay to refer to older adults in a negative manner as this perpetuates ageism and puts our views of aging in a negative light.

Age well,
Angela Gentile

Focussing on the Positive Side of Turning 65

I came across this great website, The Eldering Institute, and I was quite impressed with the positive messages that it has about the second half of life, and more specifically, turning 65.  Eldering ceremonies, education sessions, and other material is available to those in the USA, Canada and South America.  Here is their "Vision", taken directly off their website:

The Eldering Institute Vision

The Eldering Institute® is about what we can do, and more importantly, 

who we can be as we grow older. We are committed to creating a new interpretation 

or paradigm for the second half of life—one that allows us to experience love, 

health, happiness, creative self-expression and being valued and to have as much 

possibility on the last day of our lives as we had when we were born.

Our purpose is to supply support, training and development, books and materials 

for those engaged in transforming the paradigm of aging.

To get more information on The Eldering Institute, please click on this link: http://www.eldering.org/.



Age well,
Angela Gentile

The Dirty Old Man in Pop Music

There is a song by a popular female artist Kesha called, Dinosaur(2010).  Although the tune is catchy, when you listen closely to the lyrics, you quickly realize that it is about a young girl that is complaining about an "old man" looking at her.  This conjures up negative feelings in me, and it perpetuates a "dirty old man" image.  I wish the younger generation would not produce songs like this because it puts old age in a negative light.  This is called, "ageism".  This is where people assume that older people do not deserve to be treated with respect and do not deserve the same privileges of the younger adult population because of their age. Ageism is harming our society, and songs like these aren't helping the situation.

Here are some of the lyrics:

Oh man, Why are you starrin' at me
Mack on me and my friends it's kinda a creepy
You should be prowling around the Old folks home
Come on dude! Leave us alone

When Kesha was discussing why she wrote this song, she said,

"Dinosaur" came "about [when] this old guy who was hitting on me, and his toupee was kind of falling off, and I was like, "Oh my God, you're so old, you're prehistoric, you're like a dinosaur. D-I-N-O-S-A-you are a dinosaur." (From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_%28Kesha_album%29)

 
Click on this link to see a music video (not the official one) of Ke$ha's Dinosaur: http://vodpod.com/watch/3578477-dinosaur-kesha-music-video.


Angela Gentile

Over 90 and Loving It - Documentary

Over 90 and Loving It is a new documentary about people over 90 and all the wonderful things they are doing.  Getting married, getting Master's Degrees, and Breaking World Records for the Pole Vault. are just some examples.  It looks like a great video, and I look forward to checking it out.  Kudos to Excutive Producer and Director Susan Polis Shutz for a job well done, and putting a positive view on the "oldest-old"!

Check out the Over 90 and Loving It website here: http://www.over90film.com/.

Age well,
Angela Gentile

Positive Aging with Arnie

It is encouraging to see positive views of aging in the media.  There is far too much negative out there, and I wanted to share this commercial that I came across on TV.  It's about an older man who is getting ready to go out to see two older ladies, and he realizes that his glasses are not quite cutting it anymore.  Kudos to Lenscrafters for a well-done advertisement and presenting older adults in a positive light.

Here is the link for the video on YouTube.com, "Arnie and Two New Lovely Ladies" : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46tvMsrb8MM&playnext=1&list=PL72B6B98F3E986396

Age well,
Angela Gentile